PEUT-ON ENCORE PUNIR NOS ENFANTS?

CAN WE STILL PUNISH OUR CHILDREN?

To punish or not to punish?

There seems to be a divide on the issue, between the right-thinking positive education, and the fervent defenders of so-called “old-fashioned” education, crying scandal and the child king.


For my part, my thinking always follows the same keystone, I position myself neither on one side nor the other, and ask myself a single question:

WHAT IS THE INTEREST FOR THE CHILD?

If it is a question of punishing to show those around us that we have control over our child and to flatter our ego, then I say no!
If it's about punishing to scare and have peace, then I say no!
If it's about punishing because we've been punishing for centuries and we haven't died from it, then I say no!

But if it is a question of protecting our child, of teaching him something that will be useful to him in life, like a value or a concept, then I qualify my answer.

For me, it’s about giving meaning to it all! The quest for meaning being a fundamental need, it would not be a question of punishing, but rather of giving a LOGICAL CONSEQUENCE , directly linked to the behavior that we condemn.

The idea would be to instill in our child the notion of RESPONSIBILITY: “If you act like this, there will be this natural consequence.”

For example:
- If you lie, we can't trust you! Consequence: we give you less freedom.
- If you are not respectful of others, they will appreciate your company less! Consequence: you will find yourself alone.

Putting a child in the corner, making him copy lines, very rarely makes sense in relation to his attitude, if not never.

What do you think?
Are you more for good punishments that mark the occasion, or for a logical consequence?

Share your opinion in comments (with respect of course, otherwise I'll put you in the corner :)

Back to blog

Leave a comment